Response to Tragedy
From a pastoral perspective:

The Rev. Dr. Pamela Cooper-White, Associate Professor of Pastoral Theology

This talk today is focused primarily for ourselves and how to care for one another in community and to recognize effects on us that we may not have realized--because until we attend to ourselves and our own community, we will not be as effective in giving care to others. However, what I am about to share is also very applicable to other settings where we may ourselves be called upon to minister to others, our families, congregations, and other communities to which we belong.

There are some excellent resources on the web. For example, at the ELCA website, there is a page of worship resources prepared in response to the September 11 tragedy, from which you can download the booklet "Prepared to Care: A Booklet for Pastors in the Aftermath of a Human-Caused Disaster." in Adobe Acrobat format. [see also Online Resources.]

Main point this morning: We are in a post-traumatic time.

In disaster psychology terms, we are all collectively somewhere between the first "impact" phase of last week, and what is called the "recoil" phase where people try to "put the world back together." The third phase of "recovery," and finding a "new normal" will take time, and will be very individual. Thomas Attig's book entitled How We Grieve: Relearning the World makes the point that the central task of all grieving is to relearn the world anew after loss. Right now, we are all "relearning the world," and it will take a good bit of time. Remember: it takes two years on average to return to some kind of "new normal" after a death or major loss, and that's with consciously working the grief through.

Here are four main things to consider as we all help one another to move from impact through recoil to recovery.

1. The Recall/Intensification Effect: This kind of disaster--all the more intense because it is of human design and therefore raises even greater horror regarding evil--will bring up old griefs and losses, and old traumas, very similar to an anniversary reaction, and will also intensify reactions to other recent or current crises such as divorce or bereavement.

Some people may seem to be having reactions disproportionate to their own personal losses in this immediate disaster, or from your own perspective of what would seem "normal." Remember that this is very individual, and may be having resonances for people of earlier losses, griefs, and traumas. It's important not to judge others' reactions, but to recognize that we all will process this at very different speeds and in different ways.

2. Differing Reactions: We will all be in very different places in our response to this disaster. Remember, feelings happen to us--we do not and should not try to judge or control them in ourselves or others. We do need to monitor and contain our behavior appropriately, but we equally need to honor our feelings and take care of them without judgment or shame.

3. Differing Impacts on Each of Us: Disaster will impact us all in very different ways. Some of this impact we will be very aware of, and other dimensions may be less conscious, in our emotions, our bodies, and/or our behavior. Our awareness of the impact can also shift day by day or even hour by hour, depending on how safe we are feeling at any given time. Impact will occur in four domains: our thoughts, our feelings, our bodies, and our behavior:

• Our thoughts: We may find ourselves being very distracted or forgetful. We may find it difficult to concentrate. All these are normal byproducts of a healthy dissociation, which is cushioning us from cognitive overload. On the opposite end of the spectrum, we may have periods of a kind of "hyper-focus" which may be a result of a human response to crisis, by narrowing our focus and giving us a very pinpointed clarity for particular tasks, and/or our mind's way of trying to re-create a sense of control. (We may also find these two tendencies alternating at various times.)
• Our feelings: We may be "all over the map," individually and collectively. Each of us may be in very different affect states from others. Intense feelings in the aftermath of a disaster like September 11 may seem "irrational" or "crazy" to us, but they are normal reactions to abnormal events. Common feelings in the aftermath of a disaster include various forms of anger; anxiety, worry or fear; sorrowful or depressed feelings; guilt (including survivor guilt) as well as shock and numbness. Anger in particular may be displaced--aimed at a target closer at hand because the real object of our anger may be so elusive or distant, so that we may find ourselves being irritable or angry out of proportion to the given circumstance with a spouse or co-worker, or some authority figure or even political figure; or, on the other hand, it may be generalized, as in feeling a sense of prophetic wrath against an entire nation or people. If we have ever been angry at someone before, we may "dump" further post-traumatic anger on them now. Staying conscious about how the disaster is affecting us emotionally is the best antidote to behaviors that seem to just "come out of nowhere" and cause problems for ourselves and other people, which leads to the third domain…
• Our behavior: We may find ourselves doing things that are not like our usual way of being. If we are distractible, we may even have things happen to us like losing things, or even getting into an accident. If we do not connect up the feelings we are having to the fact that we are in a post-traumatic state, we may say or do things that are not helpful to us or to our relationships. We should all bear in mind as members of a community that we can just assume that we are not going to be as rational in the next days and weeks as we may think we are. Our behaviors will all reflect a certain "undertow" of post-traumatic reaction, whether we want to acknowledge this or not. Nor will our awareness of ourselves ever be complete or "perfect." We will need to have perspective, and be as tender with ourselves and each other as possible during this time. And fourthly,…
• Our bodies: Somatic reactions to grief and disaster are common. We may have headaches, stomach aches, fatigue. Our sleep and our appetites may be affected. We may become more vulnerable to illness at this time, because our immune systems are "taking a hit" from the shock of last week. It's important to pay attention to bodily signs of distress, and be even more attentive to self-care than normally. In the longer term, unexpressed and unacknowledged feelings don't go away, they go inside us. (example of survivors of the Oakland Hills fire) It is important to be attentive to ourselves and each other to prevent longer-term health consequences down the road.

Finally,…

4. We all tend to "revert to type." To help understand why some of our differences tend to emerge as they do, it's helpful to realize that people will "revert to type" (even more than usual) in the aftermath of a crisis. This is helpful in keeping perspective that not everyone will be responding to this disaster the way we ourselves may be, and to try to avoid judging others' ways of handling the aftermath. Remember the Myers-Briggs?

Think about the four major axes (I or E, T or F, etc.), and consider whether you have been irritated with yourself or someone else for reacting differently than you--maybe it has had something to do with one of these four areas where we do come to the world in very different ways:

• introvert vs. extravert ("I" vs. "E") - we all need different amounts of time alone and time with others to process all that has happened to us
• thinking vs. feeling ("T" vs. "F") - some of us will want to analyze events, do political or social critique, or begin to engage in abstract theological reflection about questions such as theodicy and the nature of God and evil; others of us will want to stay with how it felt when we got the news on Tuesday, how we've been feeling since, how we feel now, and what is needed to take care of our feelings and the feelings of others.
• Sensing vs. intuiting ("S" vs. "I") - some of us in this time will be very practically oriented, and this may come out in terms of wanting to get involved in a concrete disaster relief effort or it may be in terms of being very task oriented about "getting back to business as usual." Others will be more engaged in future visioning, whether this means how to stop terrorism, plan worship, or organize care for victims.
• "Judging" vs. "perceiving" ("J" vs. "P") - (this category is really a misnomer, and refers not to judgmentalism so much as a preference for closure vs. open endedness). Here again, there may be some who are eager to get closure on this experience and get things "back to normal" as quickly as possible; others may want to allow space and time for as much processing as possible for as many as need it as long as they need it.

Also, because we are not all at the outer extremes of each of these categories, the more we are toward the middle on some of them, the more we may shift back and forth. When we are with someone else who not only just in an opposite type, but perhaps just stronger or weaker than we are on the same type, we are likely to polarize into opposite tendencies, causing conflict that sometimes even seems to "come out of nowhere."

The important thing with these four areas of difference is to refrain from judging or labeling one another--or ourselves--as "right" or "wrong" in our approach. We need to value our differing needs and responses at any given time, and recognize that we are all in different places. This is, perhaps, an especially good time to try to stretch ourselves a bit, to try to learn from other types, while recognizing that our own type is valid. We need each other especially in a time like this--thinkers and feelers, visionaries and pragmatists, contemplatives and activist. We all belong at the table, and this in itself is a "foretaste of the feast to come."

Summary:

To sum up, as a community of people with such different responses, different temperaments and timelines, we need to cut each other a little slack for this period of time, and remember that we all will have different, valid needs, so try to accommodate one another as we move through the aftermath of these terrible events together! Be tender with yourself and with each other.

"Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." --Matt. 11:28-29.

God is our refuge and strength,
A very present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear, though the earth be moved,
And though the mountains be toppled into the depths of the sea;
Though its waters rage and foam,
And though the mountains tremble at its tumult.
The Lord of hosts is with us;
The God of Jacob is our stronghold.

--Psalm 46:1-4

HANDOUT:
PASTORAL RESPONSE IN IMMEDIATE CRISIS

Basic crisis intervention steps apply:

First things:

• Are you safe now?
• Do you need medical attention?
  (If this is a phone call: get phone number & location in case disconnected)

1. Get story clear
2. Validate feelings
3. Explore options and resources for support
4. Close with a plan of action or next step(s) to be taken, however simple

Closing:

• Summarize plan
• Validate courage and express appreciation that they called
• Offer prayer, as appropriate
• Special considerations to keep in mind (from Worden, Ch. 6)

1. Take initiative and make contact as soon as you hear of the death, crisis, or trauma - people may not be able to ask for help while in state of shock. Rather than "Do you need any help?" begin with: "I'm here to help. Can you tell me what's happened?"
   
   
2. Help survivors to actualize the reality of the loss
   
   • advocate for their choice to view the body; do help prepare them for what they may see if there is severe damage or mutilation
   • use words "dead," "death," and not euphemisms: "accident," "passed away"
   • help keep focus on the death and loss, not just the circumstances of the accident and/or blame
     
     
3. Advocate to protect a space for survivors to have privacy and physical comfort; help them not to neglect their bodily needs in time of shock
   
   
4. Take care of your own anxiety and helplessness so that you do not fall back on empty reassurance, platitutes and cliches. Rather than "It's going to be all right" (= false promise), say something like "This is very hard, but I know you can get through this." "You will survive." "You are not alone, God is with you and the church is with you." -Cooper-White, Death, Dying & Bereavement, Session 11

Resources for Pastoral Response to Disaster

Two Key Resources for Right Now:

Excellent resources are available on the elca web site at www.elca.org/dcs/disaster. See especially "Prepared to Care: A Booklet for Pastors in the Aftermath of a Human-Caused Disaster" - go to this web site and choose "Emotional Crisis Response Booklet."

Lutheran Pastor and former LTSP professor Foster McCurley and Rabbi Alan G. Weitzman have written a helpful book out of their own experience doing disaster relief work. The title is Making Sense Out of Sorrow: A Journey of Faith (Trinity Press International, 1995). Copies have been ordered through our bookstore, and it is also available through amazon.com and other major online distributors.

Some Other Bibliographic Resources for Further Study and Exploration:

Kathleen Billman and Daniel Migliore, Rachel's Cry: Prayer of Lament and Rebirth of Hope (Cleveland, OH: United Church Press, 1999) - an excellent biblical and theological discussion of prayer, lamentation and hope in times of suffering.

Kenneth Mitchell and Herbert Anderson, All Our Losses, All Our Griefs: Resources for Pastoral Care (Philadelphia: Westminster, 1983). A classic statement of pastoral theology and pastoral care for those suffering grief and bereavement.

Thomas Attig, How We Grieve: Relearning the World (New York: Oxford, 1996).

Judith Lewis Herman, Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence--from Domestic Abuse to Political Terror (Cambridge, MA: Harvard Univ. Press, 1995). A feminist analysis of trauma and dissociation at both personal and societal levels.

Lenore Terr, M.D., Too Scared to Cry: How Trauma Affects Children and Ultimately Us All (New York: Basic Books, 1990). Explains common emotions of childhood psychic trauma (terror, rage, denial and numbing, unresolved grief, shame and guilt), and describes steps toward healing and strategies for treatment.

Separate page: Helping Children Cope with Disaster

--Cooper-White, Disaster Resources 9/18/01