New Students, Fall 2003

Called at 14:
Ari Mattson

Ari Mattson says he received a call to serve God when he was only 14. A member of Bethesda Lutheran Church, Eugene, OR, Ari had participated in his second mission trip to a skid row area in Los Angeles with his youth group. "As I thought of all the people walking the streets and living in the poor neighborhood that surrounded us, I felt my heart welling up and an overwhelming sense that I would never be happy unless I was working in the church." As a youth he was a leader and had a group of friends with whom to share his understanding of theology and passion to help others. "I belonged to a church that valued its youth group incredibly." When he graduated from high school with a 4.0 average Ari recalls he was at the "fairy tale portion of my life." In college the perspective changed. Attending a Christian college he found some Christians "who were hypocrites, not even bothering to go to church. Everyone else seemed to be Bible-thumping fundamentalists who had a narrow definition of Christianity that didn’t fit my understanding," Ari recalls. He began to wonder "if I was the one who had it wrong…" Without the assurance of a loving God he said he began to feel "my life I had no purpose and I slipped into a depression." He continued to go to church and kept connected to God "even when I didn’t believe…" Embarrassed by his lapse of faith he didn’t feel worthy to share God’s gospel with anyone. "Then I had a conversation at church with a woman to whom I confessed my struggle with doubt and depression." The woman had been going through a similar struggle. "As I talked to others I began to feel I was closer to the norm in my struggles. I found most people in church have problems they are too embarrassed to discuss with others." Now in his early days at seminary Ari is pursuing a call he first understood in his teen years but from a different, deeper perspective. "All of us are broken people, and none of us is worthy to share the Gospel, but that is precisely what makes it so powerful," Ari says. "We have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. My trials showed me that there is nothing God cannot redeem and use for his glory."